If you describe the way you behave in conflict situations, you can learn a lot about yourself and why some conflicts between family or friends are unresolvable.
Even best friends and deeply in love couples are not immune from the emergence of conflict situations that lead to disagreements. Psychologists have divided human behavior in conflict situations into five different types. The Daily Mail can identify what type you are and this will make it possible to understand why some conflicts bring so much negativity.
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Some studies show that it’s nothing to worry about if the husband and wife fight once a week. In fact, this speaks of a strong and long-term relationship. You may disagree or agree with this statement, but the truth is: all people react differently to conflict situations. For some it is easier to withdraw into oneself, for others, on the contrary, it is important to win the conflict.
Conflicts and their solutions
Despite all the joy that close family relationships or relationships with best friends bring, sooner or later they lead to conflicts. Sometimes such a conflict seems unresolved, and some people give up in front of a partner, which can negatively affect their future relationship. Psychologists believe that the best way to resolve conflict situations may be the ability to understand the essence of the conflict and negotiate for general reconciliation. But sometimes this is very difficult for some people to do.
As early as 50 years ago, psychologists Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kielmann studied people’s different approaches to conflict and divided the responses to conflict situations into five types, which were given the following names: turtle, shark, fox, owl, and teddy bear. Scientists have suggested that human behavior in conflict situations and response to conflict is a reflection of how a person can balance their own goals with those of others.
5 types of human behavior in a conflict situation
Social psychologist David Johnson has studied this type of human behavior and modeled our typical responses to conflict, referring to how a person prioritizes a particular situation. The final version of the study was the same 5 different human behaviors in conflict situations. By reading them, you can find out what type you are.
- Shark. “Sharks” fiercely defend their interests in a conflict situation and use an aggressive strategy to win. At the same time, such people often cause significant harm to relations with a partner. “Sharks” protect their interests at all costs and may even resort to intimidating or morally suppressing a partner.
- Tortoise. “Turtles” give up both their own goals and the goals of another person during conflict. They ignore the conflict situation and try to hide in their “shells” as soon as possible. That is, such people close in on themselves and the conflict is not resolved for a long time.
- Teddy bear. People who belong to this type of behavior try to moderate the conflict at all costs, while giving up their interests. That is, they sacrifice themselves for the sake of maintaining relationships. They often surrender to a partner so that nothing bad happens in their family.
- Fox. “Foxes” always try to find a compromise solution to the conflict. For this reason, they may make some concessions in order for the other person to reach their goal. But in the end this leads to results that are far from ideal for both parties, although the “foxes” believe that if no one achieves the desired result, the main thing is to find a compromise solution.
- Owl. Owls take conflict resolution very seriously, which they perceive as a problem to be solved. Therefore, they spend time understanding the essence of the conflict in order to find a way to achieve the goals for both sides. “Owls” do not stop fighting for conflict resolution until this situation is over. Therefore, such people look for different solutions so that in the end everyone is satisfied.
“Teddy Bear” will not be a “shark”
Some psychologists argue that how a person can balance their own needs with the needs of others is a reflection of their personality and life experiences. For example, people whose early experiences have taught them that their feelings are not important are more likely to act in conflict situations in a way that minimizes or eliminates their desires.
Researchers from Boston College in the USA studied the behavior patterns in conflicts between spouses who have been married for an average of 35 years. It turns out that the types of behavior can change as you live together for a long time, but not too serious changes.
In other words, in successful couples, people change their behavior to match their partner’s, but psychologists say it’s unlikely that a person will change from “teddy bear” to “shark.” At the same time, research shows that the duration of relationships between people depends on how they resolve conflicts. So successful for both parties. The longest relationships are those in which the conflict is resolved constructively and the results of the resolution suit two people equally. Therefore, the scientists say, the relationship between the two “sharks” may last a long time, but they are unlikely to bring satisfaction compared to the relationship between the two “owls.”
Focus he had already written that physicists had finally confirmed the selfish behavior hypothesis.
Source: Focus
Ashley Fitzgerald is an accomplished journalist in the field of technology. She currently works as a writer at 24 news breaker. With a deep understanding of the latest technology developments, Ashley’s writing provides readers with insightful analysis and unique perspectives on the industry.