It breaks the heart even more. Why does a “ghost” friend feel more lonely than a “ghost” lover?

“Ghost friends”—that is, when someone stops communicating with you altogether, effectively becoming a “ghost”—is rarely a pleasant feeling. It makes you think about what you might have done wrong, why the person chose to leave you without explanation, and what you could do differently to not become a “ghost”. Chances are, the person doing this to you feels even worse—at least if you were friends, not romantic partners, first, writes IFLScience.

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“Ghosting” has become a common phenomenon in recent years and can happen in both romantic relationships and friendships. Despite this prevalence, however, research on “ghosts” has almost always focused on one particular aspect: the experience of those whose romantic partner becomes a “ghost.” What about the perspective of those who have become “ghosts”?

Michaela Forrai, a PhD student in the AdMe research group at the University of Vienna, sought to answer that question in her new study of ways to end relationships. He was intrigued by the phenomenon of “ghosts” and the possibility of “ghosts” among his friends—both subjects that received relatively little academic attention.

To fill this gap in the scientific literature, Forray and his team interviewed 978 young people about their experiences with “ghost” romantic and platonic partners. Four months later, another survey was conducted to measure changes in participants’ experiences over time.

The results were surprising: While we’re most familiar with romantic “ghosts,” the loss of friends is no less remarkable – at least in terms of “ghosts.” The researchers found that not only were the two conditions caused by different causes, but the outcomes for each were markedly different.

The main cause of romantic “ghosts” is excessive communication, but that doesn’t seem to be the case for “ghost” friends. On the other hand, “ghost” friends seem to have more to do with how you feel about yourself than your partner. The higher your self-esteem, the more likely you are to become a “ghost” friend – the result, according to the researchers, is greater belief in your ability to change the person you decide to break up with.

But while this may seem like an easy solution, researchers have discovered that it can have a negative impact on a person’s well-being. People who claimed to have “ghost” friends in the past were more likely to report an increase in their depressive tendencies after four months. However, this does not apply to “ghosts” of romantic partners: no temporal associations were found between “ghost” loved ones and depressive tendencies.

Forray warns that we need to consider our behavior towards “ghosts”, especially in friendships, to avoid negative consequences for ourselves and for them. In general, research on “ghosts” is just beginning and more information is needed to get a full picture of this phenomenon.

However, Forray and his team have many ideas for further research, and we can expect to learn more about this mysterious and harmful behavior in the future.

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Important! This article is based on and does not contradict the latest scientific and medical research. The text is for informational purposes only and does not contain medical advice. Be sure to see a doctor for a diagnosis.